Recently, I went to a festival and I had to sneak in my weed. Feeling like a teenager about to be busted got me thinking of all the hilarious incognito cannabis use that has happened over the years; as well as all the tricks that have been used to hide it.
Considering that these won’t be nearly as necessary in the future, I think it’s time we look at some of the ways we got by.
After all, we can all use a laugh or at least some new disguise ideas…
Peanut Butter
This is my mom’s old trick from back in the 70’s and I almost lost it when she recommended it to smuggle joints into a festival… use peanut butter.
Triple bag your cannabis and get a jar of peanut butter that is about double the size of your bag (if you have a lot of weed, you will need multiple jars). Hollow out the center of the jar but do not disturb the layer touching the glass.
Position your weed inside and smooth a layer of peanut butter on top so that the jar looks undisturbed.
Pro’s (according to my mom)
– few will suspect this disguise
– drug dogs love peanut butter so the cops will be thrown off
– you get a lovely bonus and get to make peanut butter cookies (We ate a lot of those growing up)
Con’s (according to me)
– It’s ridiculous
– You have to explain why you are travelling with your own personal peanut butter collection
(I’ll admit this is easier for some than others)
– The weight of the jar would be obviously off (an ounce of weed is definitely lighter than 3 cups of peanut butter)
Makeup bag (containing a large amount of tampons)
This trick has been used by a lot of my girlfriends and one of my most clever male friends. Basically, you put your cannabis in the bottom of a makeup bag and cover it with first makeup, then at least 5 tampons (10 if they don’t have applicators).
It is risky and totally relies on the awkwardness of the person searching your bag. Pulling this off completely depends on tricking security into feeling like they are invading your personal privacy.
The best example I have ever seen of this trick working was when my male friend used it.
He brought the makeup and told security he had to bring it for his girlfriend who was already inside. When they opened up the bag and saw the tampons, they let him through right away. He didn’t have a girlfriend at the time, used his sister’s makeup bag and went to Shoppers to buy tampons.
Pro’s
– If it works, your cannabis is in an easy to reach place
– It’s discreet
Con’s
– For me, this trick has always worked but it’s a bit nerve-wracking
– If a drink explodes in your bag, your weed can get soaked
– If you lose your purse or have it stolen, its bye bye weed
– If you don’t get a period, you have to buy tampons (bummer)
On Your Person
Strapping it to your body somehow or sticking it in a random pocket has usually been the go-to for most people. I, along with many other people, have stuffed their bras with buds. I know many people who have gone to the lengths of sewing secret pockets into clothing, hats, shoes and purses. This smuggling trend caught on pretty early and more and more clothing companies started to add secret compartments to their products.
If you want to pull this one off, you need to be pretty stealthy and creative in the place you put it and how you attach it.
Pro’s
– It is very discreet if you make it through security
– Your cannabis is with you so there is no chance of losing it or having it stolen
Con’s
– Your product can get damaged – crushed buds, flattened joints, shatter that starts to auto-butter… all are a reality thanks to hugs, body heat and sitting on your weed by accident… Worse, your weed could smell like feet.
– Getting busted is embarrassing because it will happen during a pat down. Do not underestimate this! I had a guy friend who was so worried about this that he used velcro to attach a bag of joints to his inner thigh (seriously). ”They even poked my balls”, security patted him down everywhere and he firmly believed it was a close call.
With legalization coming, these issues will start to become a thing of the past. Until then, if you have to sneak in your cannabis, I wish you the best of luck.
- Be creative
- Be bold and think outside of the box
- Believe in your stealth